January 19

Tags

New Kink I’m Into: 2016 Is for “Loving Extremism”

Ever-Evolving List:

  • I want to blast radical feminist music into your ears while you just worship my feet. Like, I want to force you to think about the patriarchy while you are on your knees. Learn to truly hate yourself in a way that goes far beyond your unending desire to suck cock or whatever your fucking boring, pedestrian kink fantasy is.
  • Since I’ve moved beyond standard FinDom and am officially tired of you thinking that a woman getting some money from you is the highlight of her existence, what I want NOW is a trophy room: I want you to match your gifts to me at a charity of my choosing. I want a screenshot of “contribution conformation” in the exact dollar amount that you threw at me in a desperate attempt to win my favor. I want to put the payment screen for each, side by side, print it out, and make a photo album I can flip through when I’m taking a bath.
  • I want you to buy sex toys for every female friend I have and then send me audio recordings of you crying because you will never see us use them. I want to make a mixtape of men crying about exclusion and rejection.
  • I want you to send me recordings in general of your weird 2am thoughts about me and how much you love me, or just you weeping, whichever, with the full expectation that I will use them to make my mix, that will absolutely be posted online when it is complete.
  • I want long love letters that you never expect a reply to. Like, please feel free to spend your time complimenting me and then just go ahead and die alone.

Literally all of those things will make you a better human being, and you can contribute to what I guess we can call an artistic endeavor, on top of enjoying the most primo dominatrix you can ever hope to engage with.

Maybe if you’re lucky, I’ll use your sad recordings to mix a hypno track for you to jerk off to.

TO BE CONTINUED